55 °F Ocean City, US
November 5, 2024

Love and acceptance is an easy decision; demonization doesn’t help

Early this month when three Ocean City Board of Education candidates held a rally in Mark Soifer Park, not one of them said anything about excluding LGBTQ+ students from local schools or that they were not welcome. 

Even the candidates’ invited speaker, who caused outrage among members of the larger community because of his virulently anti-gay rhetoric, did not say LGBTQ+ students should not be in the schools.

However, anyone who is or identifies as anything other than a straight male or female would have felt unwelcome at the rally, in schools or anywhere in society based on what was and wasn’t said.

No one at the rally spoke up in opposition when the guest speaker made fun of the queer community and used Bible verses to denigrate its very existence. It was the opposite. His comments were supported.

There was not love or acceptance extended to anyone beyond “good Christian families.” That includes in the speeches given by the three candidates. Their focus was on the new state Comprehensive Health and Physical Education standards, repeating the same talking points they used in recent months to try to convince the school board to reject the standards. 

They did not denigrate LGBTQ+ students, but in assailing the standards where they mention any discussion of gender, it has the effect of refusing to acknowledge a population that does exist in the schools and in society at large. In reference to the speaker, just saying “we didn’t agree with everything said” doesn’t go far enough. Those candidates invited him to the rally; they should accept responsiblity for what he said if they refuse to disavow him.

Kids who are or feel different already have a tough time fitting in at school; minimizing their existence via what is or isn’t being taught can only serve to make that worse. 

There are a lot of families in our local communities, including good Christian families, who have children in the LGBTQ+ communities or are allies. That was evident in a Welcome Walk around the outside of Ocean City High School Sunday, Sept. 18, formed by a new group, We Belong Cape May County. It also was evident in a petition drive asking the school administration to issue words of support to reaffirm that “queer students are not only accepted in the schools and welcome and their participation and existence is valued.”

The petition garnered more than 4,500 signatures. While critics claim that many of those signatures were from outside of the area and that it was the work of “extremists,” the petition was initiated by a 2022 OCHS graduate and signed by plenty of local people, many of whom noted distressing treatment of the LGBTQ+ students at OCHS. 

The people who held the Welcome Walk are not outside agitators. They are homegrown, unlike the candidates’ inflammatory Prayer Rally speaker, whom they imported from north Jersey.

No one can claim they speak for the entire greater Ocean City community. That is evident by the rift over this issue. All should agree that spewing hateful comments toward anyone on either side is unacceptable and does nothing to show tolerance or move our students’ education forward.

Athough they didn’t reaffirm the welcome for LGBTQ+ students, Superintendent of Schools Dr. Matthew Friedman and school board President Dr. Patrick Kane vowed the district will “unequivocally welcome and educate every child.” Because they had wide latitude, district educators designed a health curriculum around the new state standards that eliminates most of the controversial aspects and directs inquisitive students to ask their parents when they want to know more than what is being taught about sensitive (sex ed) topics. 

Given that work needs to be done because queer students report ongoing harassment at school, and that parents/candidates opposing the standards say opting out of the curriculum doesn’t go far enough, it is fair to expect there are adults and students on both sides who will not be wholly satisfied.

However, love and acceptance of our LGBTQ+ students is an easy decision to make. So is the understanding that people are allowed to disagree over how students are educated. What will not serve the community or students is demonizing opponents.

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